Hold on! Three years later and nothing has changed?
Not true, things have changed, have, in fact, gotten worse, a lot worse, actually.
Man, that's more commas than I can count.
As it turns out, disaster does have a name. Starts with T. Rhymes with Dump. As in take a dump.
Do it on live TV for two hours every night and it's called a Task Force Briefing. You're thinking, two hours? What the fuck is up with that? But consider. It takes at least 30 minutes for Trump to get Mike Pence out of his ass before the briefing can even start. Mike's always impeccably coiffed white hair is, admittedly, a mystery.
Mike? Any comment?
The President's great and powerful ass is only matched by his great and powerful leadership during this crisis.
And by this crisis, you refer to four years of Trump in the White House? Mike, you awake?
He's so powerful ... uh ... the White House, unlike my head, does not fit up the President's ass.
And how does your wife feel about you spending so much time in Trump's ass?
She takes some comfort in the fact that I will not be alone with another woman while I'm in there.
Wow! That is surely finding the silver lining in an otherwise vile situation.
Praise our Lord!
You mean Jesus, right?
Or the President, take your pick. Have I mentioned President Trump's powerful leadership?
Okay, VP Mike, you're a fucking putz. Not that it was ever in any doubt. Now put your mask on and at least try to pretend you're a human being.
Moving on.
I think it's for the best.
Recently, various famous and/or quasi-famous people have taken to twitter to proclaim that they've finally figured it out. Trump is insane. Wow! Of course, to anyone with functional senses and a modicum of intelligence, this has been fairly obvious since the Narcissist-In-Chief took office. And it's not even an interesting kind of insanity. It's obvious, trite and boring, albeit fucking scary. Trump is a delusional, not very bright, mean-spirited, thoroughly corrupt lunatic. THIS IS NOT NEWS!
The really troubling bit is that 40% of Americans still support him. Although after advising the public to swallow bleach as a cure for the Corona Virus, maybe that number has dipped down to 39. I've been asking this question for years, but what the fuck is wrong with these people? The sad truth is that mental competence is no longer a requirement for a US president. You can be as crazy, stupid and incompetent as you like. Screw the world and fuck the planet as much as you want. It's all good. Use the office to make money for yourself and inflict harm on anyone who refuses to kiss your fat ass.
Don't mind Mike's head, you can just go ahead and smooch it. Either cheek is fine.
Just don't do or say anything that even suggests progressive thinking - or any kind of thinking, for that matter - or inclusiveness, or compassion, or even a minimal grasp of the English language. Because what Trump supporters really like is having a president who's even less intelligent than they are. Thought they may have had it in Bush, but now there's absolutely no doubt. And he's white ... well, okay, orange, but so what? Orange is a nice color. It's also the new black, apparently.
Q: Does Trump know he's insane? A: They say the insane are always the last to know.
Mike?
Even if the President is insane, it's a powerful insanity, big, as well as beautiful, the kind of out of control crazy that made this country what it is, and what it will be, unless, of course, it won't be anything, because Trump is like an angry Bigfoot, standing there, snorting, and he doesn't give a crap and ... no wait, I didn't mean any of that, you're taking me completely out of context, offering up facts instead of their misleading alternatives , please don't send me to the Wall ... Kellyanne, Help!
